There are many more tragic drinking and lying moments that will be told, but for now, that enough. The picture has been painted. On August 26, 2000 as I sat in my father house, I realized that I was completely defeated and out of ideas. He and his wife had contacted my alcoholism counselor in NC and they were both now suggesting a 90day treatment facility in a nearby state. But first I would have to go to court on the second DUI charge (the one with 0.30), and that was looking like 30 days to four years in prison, unless the judge let me go to the treatment center. Details on all of that in later installments. He did allow me to go to this residential treatment center (my third in one year), and I am forever grateful.
I am a way too veteran educator special education teacher, high school principal, college professor and some other fun waystops. I write occasional OpEd pieces usually on educational issues. My sobriety date is August 26, 2000. I tell my story in hopes that it might be of some help to someone else. This is one way of giving back the gift of grace that was bestowed on me. I was taught to tell what it was like, what happened, and what it like now. I wrote one previous post on this subject, and plan to write more. I am working on writing my entire story, and these are excerpts. Today, I love and appreciate hearing people stories their life stories. This is part of mine.
Along with the drinking comes the lying. If there is one thing I have learned about alcoholics, it is that we are the best liars. And I was right there with them. My major life defense mechanism had always been to be successful, and to please people, and thereby keep them from getting to know me. My fear was that if they really knew me, then they would find out that I was no good, and stupid, and not funny and all that. I always got the highest grades in school, was captain of my high school hockey team, went to a prestigious university, and even as an adult was always outwardly competent and professional and generally highlyregarded by my peers. Promotions came relatively easy. All of my relationships were superficial. The only relationship that I could really trust and count on was with my alcohol; my real lover and love of my life. This is all true, and is all a part of the lie. I once worked as a psychiatric attendant at a major medical center. One of our patients was a chief cardiology resident and he had been admitted to the locked psychiatry ward with a drug habit. He was not allowed off the ward for any reason. One Saturday the Charge Nurse summoned me and said that she and I were going to escort him upstairs to his office to get some professional manuscripts he was working on. He had been given a 30 minute pass by the attending. This young resident/liar was charming and pleasant as always. We went into his office with him so that he wouldn do anything wrong. Later that afternoon he was totally high and messed up on drugs while under our watch on the locked unit. In a matter of seconds he had managed to somehow distract both of us just long enough to get some drugs and paraphernalia from his office, along with his manuscripts. Of course this didn look too good for the nurse and me. When the attending physician arrived, he sat us both down and reviewed what had happened. He was very calm with us and simply explained that the drug addicts were the best liars. He then went on to give us a brief course in how we could expect that the oldest drug addicts (in terms of years of addictive use) were also going to be the best liars, or else they would be in jail, or dead. I never forgot his words and how true they were.
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And helping lead the way in Arkansas is Republican state Sen. Jason Rapert. Who's he? This is.
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